For months I have anticipated writing this post. 7 months to be exact. I really anticipated wanting to SHOUT AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS in excitement, but the feeling I have is more of a quiet peace.
Not that we aren't excited. I was able to finish up the last of our paperwork last month and we were given a DTE date of 7/12/13 by our agency. What is a DTE date, you ask?
DTE stands for "Dossier To Ethiopia", and marks the date that our paperwork (a.k.a. our dossier) arrived in Ethiopia. It is a very important date, because this is what we will refer to as we wait. And, it means we are officially on the "waiting list".
Our agency has a private Yahoo group for all families adopting from Ethiopia, and there they keep an unofficial list going (so there are many people that aren't included, as they may not be active in the group). BUT, it does give us a good idea of where we're at. We are currently at #116 for an infant 0-12 months of age, and #76 for a toddler 12-24 months of age.
We will continue to move up as referrals are given, or if we decide to change our request and widen our age range or gender preference. The people at the top spots on the list have DTE dates of January/February 2011, so they have been waiting for around 2 1/2 years at this point.
Our dossier included OUR WHOLE LIFE, it seemed. Original birth certificates, marriage license, passport photos, medical records, and the homestudy among other important documents.
I love it when people (waaaay more people than I ever thought) show interest in our process. Generally the first or second questions we will get is, "when will you have the baby?". I am getting better at delivering my response. It's hard to say, "our wait will most likely be 3-4 years" and try to put a positive spin on it. You can see the disappointment in people's faces- not with us, but with the reality of it. It's hard not to get a little more disappointed along with them, but I know it's good for me to get to communicate about it. I mean, I'm basically thinking of this adoption on and off all. day. long...so when someone shows interest it's hard not to drown them in unwanted info. :)
And MOST importantly, I am realizing how important it is to TALK about adoption. God is showing me in a very personal way that adoption is the Gospel. It is a very literal way of understanding what God has done for us. It makes it tangible and understandable. Orphans all need something. They need food, shelter, clothing, health care, and families. ALL BELIEVERS are called to help.
“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”
I read Adopted For Life a few months ago and it set a great spiritual foundation for me regarding adoption. I think that many people who do not feel called to adopt themselves avoid the subject entirely. But the truth is, if you are a believer, it's an issue you're called to make a decision on. No, adoption isn't the answer for every family (and even if every Christian family did adopt, it wouldn't be the solution), but there is always a way to help. Remembering the the many ways we've been blessed by the people who have given/donated to our adoption makes me tear up. It's incredible. It's my reminder that we serve a really big, omnipotent God and we have to use those funds wisely to obey Him in this calling. It's made us as a family want to "give" adoption to others in the future.
I also love to hear that people are praying for us. Please, pray for us! Pray for the others who are adopting. Pray for the nannies and workers in Ethiopia who are serving orphans. Pray for the adoption agency workers. There is a HUGE prayer need. Please, please pray.
I do feel like I'm at the starting line of a marathon, and maybe that's why I'm not jumping up and down like crazy. We definitely celebrated our DTE date, as mentioned in this post, but I know that there will be another anniversary coming up- and maybe two, and three. Along with those anniversaries will come paperwork renewals (and the cost associated with them).
BUT- there is no shortage of reasons to PRAISE.
1- We have had more than enough funding to write every check as we've needed to up to this point. That's around $15,000.00 that was given/raised IN 6 MONTHS. Crazy. And, we won't owe another thing until we get a referral, which as I mentioned earlier could be 3-4 years away. That gives us plenty of time to come up with the rest!
2- The Lord is close to the brokenhearted. I have felt a little "broken" for a while now, and in that broken state I have loved the closeness of my Savior. I've come to crave it. I realize that doing ANYTHING by my own strength alone is meaningless.
3- Knox is just the best. In times when I'm needing to hug a little one, he's there. I am so, so, thankful for him.
4- God is doing something so much bigger than us. I've felt led to pray that there would be an adoption epidemic in my community. Haha- sounds crazy, but that's what I've been praying. It may seem backward, but I'm praying it for the benefit of the adoptive families, not necessarily the orphan...they need adoption. They need to see what it feels like, to understand it from the inside. I'm convinced that it will grow more faithful believers, and create families that God is blessed by.
5- I have a new perspective. The "want" and "need" mentality of my culture is a stark contrast to the culture of my future child. I already know that this journey is cultivating an attitude of thankfulness in me.
There are so many more, but this post has become quite long...
I'm
going to do my best to post updates each month, along with a new quilt
square! Yes, that's what you see above. It's a quilt
square. I wanted to do something that would help me count the months,
and also create something special for our child. So, this was my
solution. Each month I will knit a new square and it will have a
corresponding month number. At the end, it will be a keepsake for both
of us! So, here's to one month DTE. :)